Tuesday, March 16, 2010

Knocked down...

"Everybody gets knocked down... how quick are you gonna get up?"~ The Hours

I am facing a lot of rejection, failure in my life. Things that I put my heart into, no matter how hard I try, just can't be fixed. I can't save everything. Everything I do is not a success. And sometimes all those things collide and after a giant explosion, all I'm left with is a great big hole. No ladders, no ropes, no stairs. Just a great big gaping hole right where a life used to be. The difference for me is how quickly I'm gonna get up. I started to climb out of a hole two years ago, and made it about half way out; but, I hadn't developed my strength yet, so I fell back down. This recent explosion added a few thousand more feet to climb, but little does it know that I have been building my strength and have endurance for miles longer than it runs deep.

As the New World Spirits say, "it's one of those most satisfying feelings, to get your head kicked in, and still stand there and take another one." I can take it. I can't avoid it, so I take it. But I get up quickly. And that's when it counts. I think of all those great stories of people who fail and fail and fail, only to reach great success. It's incredible motivation, and possible a ploy to keep us from burying our heads in the sand, but it can't stop the pain or disappointment. It can gives us an extra boost, outside of ourselves, to help us climb back, to get up a little quicker.

So tonight I share with you the depth of the whole, the pain of the failures. And... that no matter what, I have the strength to run up the sides of that gaping hole, getting up quicker than most, even if to get knocked down again.

"Like Ali in the jungle, like Nelson in jail... it's not where you are, it's where you're going."  ~ The Hours

In the whole,
Beth

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